Impervious to Dis-ease

“… when we harbored grudges… we were really beating ourselves with the club of anger…” – AA p.47

Nelson Mandela said “Resentment is like drinking poison and then hoping it will kill your enemies.” Buddha said “Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned.” Getting upset is not the problem – holding onto it is what creates our misery. So why is it so hard to let go? Because we get infected, just like a virus. If our spiritual immunity system is not at its peak, when others spew out their spiritual sickness, we drop down to their level and get sick too. The solution for me is to be consistent in my spiritual devotions so that I’m filled with so much gratitude and love that I’m impervious to dis-ease. Today I’m feeling  spiritually fit and ILML! 

– JamieQ

I Am Loved

“Let go and let God, first things first, easy does it – do but do it, let it begin with me, I’d rather be happy than right… grant me the serenity to live by our sayings.” – In God’s Care

When things are going smooth, when I’m rested, spiritually and physically fit, when I’ve eaten well and everything’s going my way, it’s easy to live by these sayings. It’s those other times that it’s more challenging. When I can’t fix a problem. When I’m overwhelmed. When someone is wronging me. These are the times I need to remember the words I hear so often in our program. Pausing gives me the opportunity to remember them. Today, if I’m not “feeling it”, I’ll slow down, take a few breaths, and remember how truly great my life is and that I am loved. ILML!  

– JamieQ

A Vortex of Self-pity

“When things appear to be falling apart, a chattering imp will find its way into your head… If you listen to the imp, you will eventually be convinced that there is a fire breathing dragon waiting at every turn to devour you.” – Until Today

Anything that happens which I don’t like, takes me out of my comfort zone and puts me in dis-ease. That’s the moment that Impy starts chattering in my brain. He points out how bad it is, how bad it’s been, how bad it’s going to be. He sends me down a vortex of self-pity and resentment and shuts me off from all the goodness in my life. What’s the solution? Stop. Breathe. Make a gratitude list. Meditate. Connect with source. Call an optimistic friend. And most importantly, don’t react. Forget the problem for a minute. The answers will come. Things will get better if I simply work my program and take one step at a time. When I’m in the solution, ILML! 

– JamieQ

Possibilities Emerge

“Life doesn’t always go smoothly or peacefully, even though I might wish it would…. (but) when I face adversity and deal with my problems… every problem can help me to change for the better, deepen my faith, and add to my self-esteem. – Courage to Change 

No matter what happens in my life, once I’m willing to get into the solution, do the footwork, and practice the principles, things always get better. My attitude and perception shifts and possibilities for acceptance and change begin to emerge. Before I know it, I’m feeling grateful. And when I’m back in gratitude, ILML! 

– JamieQ

Into Me You See

“Loneliness comes from a feeling of separation, the idea that we are different.” – In God’s Care

Our program has solutions that lead to serenity, peace and happiness. This is great news for most of us, who have spent years in disfunctional relationships, destructive behavior and unhappiness. But the icing on the cake is the deep, meaningful, safe friendships we develop by showing up to meetings and that feeling of connectedness we get from exchanging intimacy (into me you see). My life is richer than I ever could’ve hoped because of all my friends in the fellowship. ILML! 

The Luckiest Man in the World

… he stands at the edge of new mysteries, joys, and experiences of which he had never even dreamed.” 12&12, p.110

I can tell you this. I’ve slept in abandoned cars. In empty homes. In jail. In a mental hospital. On a beige rug with fleas so thick it looked black. In my vomit. In a closet. And those aren’t even the really bad places. When I remember that, my life is so far beyond any dream I ever had. That’s why I tell people I truly believe that I’m the luckiest man in the world. Thank you God, AA, AlAnon,  and AlAnon. ILML! 
– JamieQ

Every Ounce of my Heart

“… let me sow love.” – 12 Step Prayer Book

I’ve discovered that in order to most effectively do this, I have to start by growing and nurturing the way I love myself. Once I came to a point where I really loved being me, and learned how to support that on a daily basis, I found that deeply loving others without being codependent was easy. Today I have many Sponsees and a Sponsor that I love with every ounce of my heart, and their love for me blesses me a thousand times over. ILML! 

  

My True Motives

“To detach … means I love myself enough to stay out of others’ insanity.” – Hope For Today 

This is a great page. It speaks to the place my head gets into when I confuse caring with attempting to fix, control, or change another. It reminds me that ‘Being helpful and kind’ is great, provided that, in my divine righteousness, I am not being kind and helpful in order to get them to do what I think is best.  Today I’ll let others behave as they wish, I’ll help if asked, detach if it’s toxic, stay connected to God and try to be the best James I can be today. ILML! 

– JamieQ

  

Restored to Emotional Health

“… practicing these Steps, we had a spiritual awakening…” – 12&12 p. 109

I like the words “spiritual awakening.” At first I thought the concept was just a cliche we use in the rooms. Today it implies that I’ve recognized that I’m disconnected from my higher power – that sense of peace, love and comfort I crave – and feel the desire to plug back in. 

As the quote states it takes some actual actions – or work – to reconnect. I do this by using the tools of the program, including my rituals, prayer, meditation, the steps, fellowship and meetings. Through consistently committing time and energy to this practice I am restored to emotional health, and best of all, once again, ILML! 

God-Dance

“… follow your own inner guidance…” – Until Today

This morning at Starbucks, while doing my daily life-loving rituals, I came across this phrase and was struck by the idea that these days my higher power, aka God, is my inner guidance. It’s the voice that directs me in ways that improve my life and circumstances, and often those of people around me. So why not have some fun and change the spelling of guidance just a bit? Today I’ll let loose, listen to the music of my heart, and “follow my own inner God-Dance!”ILML!