“If you are willing to look at another person’s behavior toward you as a reflection of the state of their relationship with themselves rather than a statement about your value as a person, then you will, over a period of time cease to react at all.” — Yogi Bhajan

If I’m totally honest, it’s not so much another’s behavior that bothers me as it is my reaction to it. When a stranger on the street acts angry, or crazy, I generally don’t react. But when I ingest the behavior of someone close to me – take it deep into my mind, body and soul – I have no choice but to react, defend and attack. My serenity evaporates and discord fills me up. One way to avoid this is to reframe the experience as its unfolding. When someone is saying or doing something I don’t like I can simply think “Wow, I’m glad I’m not in their emotional state of mind.” This opens the door for compassion and detachment, possible saving me from reacting or losing my serenity. I love the little gems I pick up in the program and ILML! 

— Jamie Q

“When you do not have a healthy or intact sense of worth, you feel the need to win every argument.” — Until Today

When I first read this page in Iyanla Vanzant’s book, I wrote the word “Me” next to that sentence. It was a huge realization; a direct connection between my actions and how I felt about myself. From that point forward, I became much more aware of what was really happening when I tried to get my way. Concurrently, I began to use program tools to rebuild my sense of worth. Today I still like to win and be right, but it doesn’t dominate me like it used to. Getting better day by day. ILML! 

— JamieQ

“Surrender your lack of faith to your Higher Power, and ask for faith.” – Courage to Change 

 This is the perfect solution for anyone struggling with the concept of a Higher Power – trust me, I know. “Ye of little faith…”, that was me. It was so hard to believe in something I can’t prove exists. Yet I wanted to believe because I saw the benefits others received from this relationship. After doing as suggested — asking a God I didn’t believe in for help to believe in that God — I finally got it. Today I have an epic relationship with my HP, one that enriches me every day. ILML! 

“From that place of peace and centering will emerge an answer, a solution.” The Language of Letting Go 

Good things come into my life when my thoughts, words and actions are being guided by a higher, more loving power. So it makes perfect sense to me that I invest time each morning into reading uplifting, positive literature. By infusing my mind (and heart) with a higher vibration, I launch my thoughts into a place of deep contentment and appreciation for this gift of living, which only reinforces the fact that ILML! 

– JamieQ

“Our real purpose is to fit ourselves to be of maximum service to God and the people about us.” – AA pg. 77

My sponsor once asked me if I knew what my personal purpose in life was. I said, “No I don’t.” He opened up the big book to page 77 and then said, “If, when you lay your head to sleep at night, you’ve stayed sober and done what’s written here, you’re a success. You’ve fulfilled your primary purpose. Even if you didn’t get this, win that, receive approval from someone else, if you’ve done what’s written here you are a winner. Remember that.” I keep that in mind, and having achieved my purpose – one day at a time – ILML! 

“Sure, things happen (but) you have the power to reshape and redefine any experience, no matter how devastating…” — Until Today

I love it when what happens makes me feel happy – it’s all good. But the true opportunity for me to evolve into a more wonderful person comes from experiences that make me feel uncomfortable. When they happen – and they will – if I take one long, deep breath I’ll open up enough space to practice patience, tolerance, understanding, acceptance, detachment and love. This is how I live the program and literally breathe it into every moment, with the result that ILML! 
— JamieQ

“Happiness is the spiritual experience of living every minute with love, grace, and gratitude.” – Denis Waitley

In this website, you’ll find some great tips on how to get and stay in the attitude of gratitude. But if you go a step further, and search the internet for gratitude tools, you’ll discover even more actions and suggestions on how to live a thankful life, appreciating every moment. I’ve found such tools to be invaluable in my desire to love life. In fact, it’s by practicing actions of gratitude consistently on an everyday basis, that I’ve managed to find, and stay in that magical place where almost every day, ILML! 

– JamieQ

“I am seeking a saner approach to everything I encounter.” – Courage to Change 

The Latin origin of the word sanity is sanus, meaning healthy. So we could say that by turning to our higher power, we can quickly restore our mental health. That’s easy for me to do because my HP is love, kindness, gratitude and compassion. When I’m aware enough to sense that I’m in an emotionally unhealthy place, I can take a deep breath, be loving to myself and others, and detach from unhealthy situations quickly. This always makes me saner (healthier), allowing me to return to that wonderful place where ILML! 

– JamieQ

“Making myself available to help and be helped by a wide range of people is a key to my recovery.” – Hope For Today 
How did the program help me love my life? After getting sober, working the steps with a sponsor and finding my higher power, I then began to use the tools in all areas of my life on a daily basis. Doors of abundance opened and my life became rich with the relationships I’ve developed in and out of the rooms. Learning to play nice with others is one of the greatest gifts I’ve received. ILML!

– JamieQ

“The pain is not in the surrender and acceptance. It’s in the resistance.” – Hope for Today
Here’s how it works for me. First, some person, place, thing or situation doesn’t meet my ‘reasonable’ expectation. Next, I’m upset and would like to get what I want. Finally, I try to change that person, place, thing or situation, while hopefully remaining sane, calm and kind. This is normal, and, in my opinion, even healthy. The problem occurs when my efforts fail. At that point, as long as I don’t keep trying to control it or them, I experience just a little pain. It’s only when I’m unwilling to surrender my efforts at control, until I get my way, that the real suffering begins. Today, I choose to surrender and remember there are no big deals, except that ILML! 

– JamieQ