“Avoid the rapids when possible. If you can’t, stay relaxed… If you go under for a moment, allow yourself to surface naturally. You will.” – The Language of Letting Go 

I do a ton of recovery work every day. Affirmations. Prayer. Yoga. Exercise. Eating healthy. Reading inspirational books. Journaling my inventory. Making amends. Writing gratitude lists. Going to meetings. Sponsorship. Sending out recovery texts and blog posts. And even with all that, the waters of my life are not always smooth and calm. When things get rough, when I am tossed and turned in the turbulent, crashing waves of my mind, occasionally I am taken under and can’t breath. In those moments, I do everything I can to reconnect with my higher power and have faith that I will survive and thrive. And I remember “This too shall pass!” and soon enough ILML! 

– JamieQ

“Living on a basis of unsatisfied demands (worried we would lose something we have or not get something we want), we were in a state of CONTINUAL disturbance and frustration.” – Adapted from Daily Reflections
The opposite way of living is to live in appreciation for all we have. If we’re feeling disturbed or frustrated, it means our focus is on our unsatisfied demands. Instead of trying to satisfy them, which doesn’t ever work for very long (because more of them come up all the time), we can make a written gratitude list, send a text to someone about why we appreciate them, or write a note to ourselves listing our recent accomplishments. By doing this, I never have to stay in a state of dis-ease for very long. When I’m aware of discomfort, and then take contrary action, ILML! 

– JamieQ

“… relish the moments… each day teems with tiny gifts… We can be conscious of every moment, thankful for every experience and every person we encounter.” – Each Day a New Beginning

The way I see it is that I can feel grateful or not, in every moment of life. When I’m not in gratitude, I’m usually blaming it on other things, people or circumstances. But the truth is that I, not other people, things or circumstances, choose how I feel. Knowing that, at any moment, I can choose to get back into gratitude, regardless of how life is unfolding, gives me the freedom to be grateful – and feel really good – no matter what is happening outside my hula hoop. And when I get back into gratitude, ILML! 

– JamieQ

“Giving advice, making decisions for others, mapping out their strategy, is not our job.” – The Language of Letting Go 

The temptation to help others, particularly those we love, is great. And helping can be a great thing, provided the other person specifically and directly asks for our help. That’s the key right there. Saving others from grief, struggle or hardship when they haven’t asked for our wisdom or assistance prevents them from failure, struggle, pain, and accomplishment. That last thing, accomplishment, is what gives them self esteem and allows them to build on success. Experiencing pain and struggle is part of that process. Today I will stop trying to manage, save, direct or control others. Instead I’ll help only if asked. By staying in my hula hoop, ILML! 

– JamieQ

“I pray for the courage to trust my destiny to God.” – In God’s Care

Our program suggests we surrender to God’s will. What exactly does that mean? Well, that would depend upon your definition of God. Mine is compressed goodness, aka gratitude, aka the love inside and all around me. So how do I know if something is my will or God’s? Simple. When I think about what I want, do I feel good? Or is the thought of not getting – or losing – what I want, causing me pain? If I answered yes to the first question, I’ve surrendered. If I answered yes to the second, I’m in self-centered fear – not trusting my higher power. By aligning my will with God’s, ILML!

– JamieQ

“… when I expect more than others can give, I am setting myself up. Trying to get something or someone on the outside to make me content on the inside is futile.” – Hope For Today

How often have I done exactly that? I’m only expecting them to behave the way that I would. Isn’t that reasonable? And when they don’t, I politely ask them to, but often the still don’t cooperate? What’s my motive? To get them to act in a manner that makes me feel comfortable. Instead of attempting to manage, direct and control others so I feel better, today I’ll let them do their own thing, while I plug into a higher vibration and take healthy actions that makes me feel good. And by doing that, ILML! 

– JamieQ

… taking a searching and fearless inventory… I was asked to recognize positive qualities about myself.” – Courage to Change 

So often when we are in the mode of self-discovery, searching for answers that will lead us to freedom and happiness, we take a hard look at our shortcomings. Ironically, though identifying problems may help in finding solutions, focusing on what we love about ourselves has a far more beneficial result: it puts us into gratitude. Just for today, why not list out 10 things that are great about you? I’ll share my list with you, and I’d love to see yours. Why are you so awesome? By focusing on the compressed good (gOd) within and all around me, ILML! 

– JamieQ

“God, free me from resentment toward them.. bless them in whatever it is you know they may need … may their life be full of health, peace, prosperity, and happiness …” 12 Step Prayer Book 
There is no way I can enjoy this moment when anger is hanging over me like a dark cloud. When I’m finally sick and tired of being angry, I find my part – any part will do – and make a heartfelt apology. I don’t expect it returned or accepted, but if neither occurs, I detach unless and until they want to forgive and/or make amends. I’m not going to be taken hostage by my anger or anyone else’s anymore. I love myself too much, which is why ILML! 

– JamieQ

“… all people, including ourselves, are to some extent emotionally ill as well as frequently wrong… it is pointless to become angry, or get hurt by people who, like us, are suffering from the pains of growing up.” 12&12 p92

How epic is that reading? Super epic! It really tells me that we all make mistakes and getting upset about anothers’ behavior is simply me choosing to waste energy which I could otherwise be expending towards enjoying my aliveness. Each and every moment counts. As we say in Al-Anon, “I am responsible for my own serenity.” Period! Today I have a choice. And my choice is, no matter what, that ILML! 

– JamieQ

“I will take time to clear my mind… release any unimportant thoughts… then allow myself to be guided toward the best action I can take for today.” – Courage to Change 
This is the essence of meditation. Often it’s hard to hear anything kind, loving or positive above the chaos of my chattering thoughts. In these moments, I simply close my eyes, breath deeply, let go of everything in my mind – including my feelings – and allow them to melt away momentarily. I can then listen for (and hear) that still, soft life-loving voice inside of me. These 1 minute mini meditations help me find my way back to the path where ILML! 

– James