12 Step

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Doing the Deal

“… when my thoughts begin with “He should” or ” She shouldn’t” I am probably in trouble…” Courage to Change 

“… sweep off our side of the street… never trying to tell him what he should do.” – AA Big Book

It’s true for me when they say that most of us are like actors who want to run the whole show. If only people would do as we wished, right? But it’s equally true that, when we live in the solution, get spiritually centered, and work our program, that we stop burning up energy foolishly as we did when we were trying to arrange life to suit ourselves. Today I’m doing the deal, which alters my perceptions, behaviors and attitudes, opening up the door of abundance. As a result, in this moment of now, ILML! 

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Invite Abundance

“Positive energy heals, conducts love, and transforms. Choose positive energy.” The Language of Letting Go 

In the morning I raise my hands up after my prayers and I invite abundance. Abundance in health, happiness and prosperity. I have my Goden Hour in the a.m. to set the tone for my day, so that I may better bring positivity into the world. The more I do these things, the more I incorporate them into my day, the more ILML! 

— JamieQ

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All in my Best Interest

“Sometimes the sign that I have actually gotten humble enough to ask my higher power to remove a shortcoming is that I can laugh about it. Suddenly a past action or decision of mine seems ludicrous and I can stop taking myself so seriously. When this happens, I realize that my higher power has lessened the impact of another shortcoming.” – Courage to Change 3/13/15

I like this quote in that if we continually work the program on a daily basis we can laugh at things that we used to think were so horrible or took so seriously at one point. 

What I would like to do is those times that I am taking life so seriously, is to remember that everything happens exactly how it is supposed to. When I am confused, frustrated or anxious, to remember that I don’t have to be, but instead I can be grateful for the experience and lessons that I will learn  which will better my life.

It really is all in my best interest — whether I like it or not. 

The more I stay connected to my higher power on a daily basis the more I am able to do this — though that’s much easier said than done. I’m going to do my best to stay in the solution another day. ILML!

– JasonW

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The Ugly Reality

“… nausea, dry heaves, the rocking bed, the nightmare-filled mind.” – From Stars Don’t Fall in AA’s Big Book

Whenever I find myself thinking about drinking in a romantic way, all I have to do is read that one line. This is the ugly reality of where the disease takes me and others. Whether it was my family, friends, strangers or me, drinking always tended to end badly. 

For people like me there is no half-glass of wine or “just one” Margarita. And my disease begins way before the drink. It starts with negative attitudes, behaviors, words and perceptions. By staying spiritually healthy I can keep my mind in a positive place and stay away from that next drink, and the total destruction of this amazing life the program has given me. 

Sobriety, not booze,  is my best friend today. And for that reason, ILML!

— JamieQ

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97% of the Time

“I can start my day over at any time. Finding a reason to feel grateful is a great way to do it.” – Hope For Today 

I’m going to be totally honest, just about everything can upset me. Most of the time things really don’t go exactly the way I want them to. 

Certainly more often than not people don’t do or say things how I believe they should. It’s generally pretty easy for me to find a reason to feel negative in some way, and if I’m in a funky place, it’s even easier. But I’ve learned how self-destructive this is. I may not be able to help initially feeling let down or upset, but I can quickly start fresh and get back into the attitude of gratitude. 

Shortening the periods of time when I’m discontent, and lengthening the intervals when I feel great is the secret to loving my life more often. 

And, because I’m working a program of action, and in the solution, most of the time, I can honestly say that about 97% of the time, ILML!

— JamieQ

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Tired of the Anxiety

“Using my self will in a situation usually has the same result as forcing the wrong piece into a jigsaw puzzle – exhaustion and frustration. When I ask God for guidance I know that whatever happens is the best possible situation, things are exactly as they are supposed to be, even if they aren’t what I want or expect. God does for me what I cannot do for myself, if I let him. – Daily Reflections 3/11/15

This is good to hear today. I have a couple situations in my life that are causing me anxiety and stress. I believe this means that I am, in some way, running on self-will and trying to force that wrong piece into the jigsaw puzzle, as the quote says. 

Today I’m going to pray and meditate, ask my higher power for direction and surrender these feelings to him. I’m tired of the anxiety. I know that things are exactly as they are supposed to be even though it is making me uncomfortable. I will do whatever it takes today to surrender to my higher power and find serenity. ILML!

— JasonW

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Mindful of the Present

“When eating, be mindful of eating. When walking, of walking. When smiling, of smiling.” – Heart of a Buddha

It is easy for me to live in yesterday and tomorrow – but only because I have practiced this ineffective behavior for most of my life. I am capable of staying present and through my experience, it only takes practice as well. Today I will be mindful of the present moment. This will permit me to stay closer to a power greater than myself and stay out of fear! iLmL

-RichieB

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An Easier, Softer Way

“I instinctively want to fix problems, and they don’t have to be mine. In fact, most of the time they’re not… doing for others what they need to do for themselves… enabled them to be irresponsible… robs others of the self-esteem that comes from struggling with and conquering the challenges…” Hope For Today

I can’t speak for women, but as a man, and a sponsor of many other men, I can tell you that this desire to “fix” runs very deep for many of us. It’s actually been one of the biggest problems in my relationship with others. Instead of listening and having empathy (or at least compassion), I offer solutions. Today I realize that, unless I’m asked for help, usually others just want me to listen and love. When I do this, instead of trying to offer my unsolicited opinion and advice, my relationships go a whole lot smoother. Grateful for all these wonderful tools. ILML! – James

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Attraction not Promotion

“If he [the teacher] is indeed wise he does not bid you to enter the house of his wisdom, but rather leads you to the threshold of your own mind”. – The Prophet

This is VERY challenging for me… I LOVE to dump what I THINK I know on anyone within an earshot. I want to adopt this new process and practice it in order to love my life even more!

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Gratitude with Boundaries

“in order to truly practice gratitude in love, we have to know where our limits are, what is acceptable to us. Sometimes for our own good and the good of the family, we must turn our attention to the negative behavior and set a boundary – beyond this I will not go.” – Attitudes of Gratitude p88

I have learned in the Program to set boundaries. I didn’t set boundaries nor did I respect others boundaries before. My relationships then were dysfunctional to say the least. This quote is a good reminder for me. Ilml!