Author: JamesQ

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Faith Filled & Fear Free

“I am faith filled and fear free..”
– Until Today

This is the intro to every page for the month of August in Iyanla Vanzant’s book, and it’s become a mantra for me, particularly in times of difficulty. I’m a big believer in affirmations, and being empowered by a faith that keeps me in the light, while free of fears that keep me in darkness, is one of the greatest gifts I know – one I hope everyone can find. Today, if I get upset, uncomfortable, or downhearted, I’ll remember her words and say them out loud until I believe them again. This is just another life loving shortcut on this path of life in recovery! ILML!

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Filled to the Brim

“In recovery, we learn that it is important to identify what we want and need. The next step is letting go… Sometimes I even have to go to the point of saying “… I realize its important to me, but … I’m going to be absolutely happy without it and without any hope of getting it, because hoping to get it is making me nuts.”… We often can have what we really want and need, or something better. Letting go is part of the what we do to get it” – The Language of Letting Go

This reading reminds me clearly that I’m only in charge of the footwork, not the results. Waiting, hoping and praying for the result I think is best for me (and sometimes others) makes me unhappy. It’s actually an expectation which, if unmet, will cause a resentment. That’s why surrendering works so well. There’s a prayer called Letting Go in the 12 Step Prayer Book. In it, the person praying surrenders their broken dreams to God, but eventually snatches them back, crying “How can you be so slow?”. To which God replies “My child, what could I do? You never did let go.” In other words, pretending to turn it over with the secret desire of hoping to get what I want doesn’t work either!

But here’s the amazing news: When I choose to remember and believe that my HP has my back and knows what is best for me – that what I get and DON’T get is perfectly designed for me to have a life beyond my wildest dreams – then my faith allows me to fully surrender and make room for all the good stuff that’s trying to come into my life. This is my experience, and I have a life filled to the brim (overflowing actually) with good stuff to prove it! ILML

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A Limitless Lode

“… he has barely scratched a limitless lode which will pay dividends only if he mines it for the rest if his life and insists on giving away the entire product” BB pg. 129

Just another reminder that trusting God, cleaning house and being of service are daily, rather than periodic, suggestions, for those of us who seek unlimited opportunities to expand our level of happiness, joy and freedom. It really does work, IF we work it. To me, it’s 1000% worth it. I work it hard and consistently, and as a result… ILML!!!! Let me know if you’re a life lover too! – James

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Focus on the Good Stuff

“Awareness is like a flashlight that illuminates whatever it is shown upon. Shine it one what’s wrong in your life, and in will feel pretty bleak. Shine it on what’s right, and you’ll be basking in the glow of the sunlight of the spirit. It really is that simple. ” – Adapted & Inspired by Attitudes of Gratitude in Love, page 49

Although the original reading was directed toward our love lives, it certainly also applies to my life in general. It goes hand-in-hand with what Dr. Paul in our program said ” I must keep my magic magnifying mind on my acceptance and off my expectations, for my serenity is directly proportional to my level of acceptance. When I remember this, I can see I’ve never had it so good.” A great reminder for a guy who wants to do whatever I can to be happy, joyous and free. Keep my focus on the good stuff in life… ILML! – James

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An Easier, Softer Way

“I instinctively want to fix problems, and they don’t have to be mine. In fact, most of the time they’re not… doing for others what they need to do for themselves… enabled them to be irresponsible… robs others of the self-esteem that comes from struggling with and conquering the challenges…” Hope For Today

I can’t speak for women, but as a man, and a sponsor of many other men, I can tell you that this desire to “fix” runs very deep for many of us. It’s actually been one of the biggest problems in my relationship with others. Instead of listening and having empathy (or at least compassion), I offer solutions. Today I realize that, unless I’m asked for help, usually others just want me to listen and love. When I do this, instead of trying to offer my unsolicited opinion and advice, my relationships go a whole lot smoother. Grateful for all these wonderful tools. ILML! – James

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Lead Me Today

“Higher Power, I do not know where the path I am on will lead me today, but I do know that Your guidance is necessary. Let me seek to remain in unity with You and with the program. Teach me this day to be tolerant and patient with others in the program. Help me to understand that my well-being is dependent on the program’s well-being.” Grateful be on set and ILML. – Rami

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No More Stagnation

“Recovery is not a stagnant process. We are either moving ahead, stuck and immobilized or backsliding. Each of us experiences each of these states in our recovery to a different extent. The important thing is that we see when we are getting into trouble and then do something about it. We need to put the program into action to stay on the right path. We need to walk in humility and be willing to ask for help along the way. Recovery is a program of action, and I need to be willing to take the steps necessary to stay on track. I need to be willing to go to any length to achieve and maintain sobriety.” DM 1health. Living in gratitude and ILML. – Rami

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Squandering our Time

BB pg.66 “To the precise extent that we permit these, do we squander the hours that might have been worthwhile.”

This sentence is in reference to resentments, but I can apply its message to many areas of my character… Judgment, righteousness, anger, fear, etc. Today I want to live a happy, loving, and effective life full of purpose. Written inventory is the beginning of the process whose payoff is a right-sized way of life. iLmL – Richie

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Our False Self

“In early recovery, I continued to have this inferiority complex. I would sit in meetings and plan out what I was going to say when it was my turn to speak. I wanted to sound like I knew what I was doing. This defect in my character was actually getting in the way of my recovery. It fed my dishonesty, and it built a wall between my Higher Power and me. It was keeping me from benefiting from the program. It is hard to swallow our pride and admit that we don’t know what we are doing. It is hard to get honest and admit it is all a show. ” – Daily Meditations from OneHealth.

Grateful for being sober and ILML.

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Rule 62

“I am no longer a victim, full of self-pity and bent on control of every aspect of my life. Today I can take myself and my circumstances more lightly. I can even allow joy and laughter to be a part of a difficult experiences. – Courage to Change

Change and transitions can often be uncomfortable and scary for me.but today I trust that my HP will open doors for me that will provide experiences beyond my wildest dreams. As I surrender disappointment from unmet expectations, gratitude flows in, and suddenly… ILML!