James’ Messages

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Soul Medicine

“… The consciousness of God’s love … brings wonderful relief from the cares and worries of our daily lives. Relief brings peace and peace brings contentment. Try to walk in God’s love.” – Twenty Four Hours A Day

I once heard someone say “be careful of what you’re thinking, your mind is listening.” That was a very important lesson for me. The more I think about the problem, or the fear, or a resentment, the more I tend to manifest what comes out of those thoughts. But like the quote from 24 Hours, when I think of God (love/gratitude) I am relived of stress, I calm down and I suddenly feel, once again, at peace. God consciousness is good medicine for my soul. ILML! – James

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Celebrate Life

Don’t be a grave robber. Let corpses alone…Every time you dig up an old grievance or an old mistake by rehearsing it in your mind or, still worse, by telling someone else about it, you are simply ripping open a grave … Live the present. The past is past—liquidate it. If a negative memory comes into your mind, cremate it with the right thought (the fire of Love) and forget it. – Around the Year with Emmet Fox.

Kaboom! If that doesn’t set it straight, I’m not sure what will. 85% or more of my struggles come from grave robbing (the rest come from future #@!!ing). Today I will not dig through maggots and rotting flesh – it’s an uncomfortable space to live in. It’s a beautiful day of life and my plan is to stay in this gift of the present and enjoy it. What about you? ILML! – James

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Plugging In

“… our members find that they have tapped an unsuspected inner resource which they presently identify with their own conception of a Power greater than themselves.”
– BB pg 183-4

This uncomplicated the concept of God for me. The program simply helped me tap into something that saved my life. Like others, I chose to believe that thing is my HP, and it’s always in me. I can unplug from my Lower Power energy, and plug into my Higher Power energy, at any time. It’s a lot easier to remember to do this when I’ve stayed connected to my program, but regardless, it’s always there. No one can take that plug away from me. Plugging in will re-energize me with peace, love, gratitude, kindness and emotional well-being. All I have to do is plug in, and just like that… ILML! – James

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(D)anger

“Recently I reacted to a situation. I started to get angry – really angry… anger is just one letter short of danger… that one-second choice between working my anger or working my program…” – Courage to Change

For me, anger is my warning siren that I’m in fear, and fear indicates that I’ve gotten disconnected from my HP. So my solution to staying out of the drama of anger is to plug back into my HP – pretty difficult to do when I’m mad, but not impossible. My secret is to (1) be aware when I’m getting angry (2) take one really deep breath in and out, and (3) get away from the cause of my anger ASAP. If I can say something nice like “sorry, I can’t talk right now” even better. But either way, if I detach right away I can avoid the emotional hangover, the wreckage and the amends I would otherwise need to make, if I did not detach. And there you have it, another little lesson I’ve learned on how to stay happy, joyous and free in recovery! ILML – James

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Desires or Peace

“Sometimes… we wonder if our desires will ever be fulfilled… But some things take time. Be patient. Relax and trust. Let go. Then, let go some more. Good things are planned for us. Relax and trust.” – The Language of Letting Go

Today I know that not all my desires will lead to happiness. Some, if fulfilled, would cause me pain. Having faith that the loving energy of life (my HP) brings to me only the ones that help me love my life, is a great comfort today. In the past I’ve push and struggled to get the others, only to suffer later when I got what I asked for. Today, I relax and search for peace more than the fulfillment of my desires. And when I approach life like this, I can’t help but be grateful. ‘Thank you God for what you have given me, thank you for what you have taken away, but mostly, thank you for what is here now.’ ILML – James

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Understanding Boundaries

“I have often tried to change other people to suit my own desires… this outlook put a strain on my relationships… knowing my own boundaries does not mean forcing others to change… the focus, today, is on me.” – Courage to Change pgs. 244 & 345

After over 30 years in recovery I still catch myself, not only wanting others to change to suit me, but attempting to get them to do so. I have 1000 justifications for asking them to change, many of them very reasonable. However, a better solution is to make requests (with zero expectation of change) to another when I feel their behavior feels uncomfortable. Then I can surrender the outcome to my HP and use my tools to get back into gratitude and love – regardless of the other person’s response to my request. That’s how I work my program when I’m in the solution. Today I’m in the solution, and because of that… ILML! – James

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Stop, Drop & Roll

“When there is a fire in your life, a problem that you have been unable to stop the spread of, do not try to fight it on your own… Just for today, go back to kindergarten. Stop! Drop! And Roll!” – Until Today

Before the program, but after I had emotionally separated from my dependence upon my family of origin, I felt alone and on my own. At first it was wonderful, but after years of feeling responsible for all my “problems”, I started to feel like a victim and unable to handle life alone. This feeling, even more than drugs and alcohol, drove me to the rooms. And Thank God it did! Today I have the support of the fellowship, a loving HP, and a vast array of tools to guide me out of the problem and into the solution. This new way of living is what makes me a life lover, and believe me, today, like most days, ILML! – James

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Just a Beginning

“Once we have taken this step, withholding nothing, we are delighted. We can look the world in the eye. We can be alone at perfect peace and ease. Our fears fall from us … now we begin to have a spiritual experience… We feel we are on the Broad Highway walking hand in hand with the Spirit of the Universe.” BB of 75

After reading this, and finishing step 5, I thought that I would forever feel at peace, never be fearful again, and always feel the presence of my HP. But my sponsor told me, if that were true, why bother with the remaining 7 steps? He pointed out the words like “we can” and “we begin”, reminding me that, although I will begin to experience peace, start surrendering fears, and feel the presence of a loving God, I must continue the work if I want to have them in my daily life. So I finished my steps, felt great, and then slowly over the next 10 years or so, lost my connection, lost my peace, and became fearful – all in sobriety.

In 2002, at 20 years sober, and again finding myself experiencing another emotional hangover, I embarked on a new rigorous, daily program of action.

Aside from prayer, meetings and sponsorship, the meat of my program was my Golden Hour.

Each morning I would spend an hour or more reading both program and recovery literature. Then I would choose one reading and send out a spiritual text (like this – but shorter) to my recovery group. During that time I meditated, did a 10th step, wrote a gratitude list, and planned my meeting. Afterwards I made some 12 step phone calls.

Today, at 31 years sober, this is still my ritual, and it really is what puts me at peace, in acceptance, reduces my fears, and connects me to my HP – which is my source of love and gratitude. Although I still have problems, things don’t go my way, and people don’t act as I wish, my ability to let Go and let God is greatly increased, and I can much more easily find happiness, contentment and gratitude, regardless of what is happening with the people, places and things in my life. ILML – James

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Eternally Grateful

“Through prayer, and meditation I open channels, then establish and improve my conscious contact with God… By maintaining my spiritual condition, by giving away what had been so freely given to me, I am granted a daily reprieve.” – Daily Reflections

When I have it, money is nice. So is being married to my wonderful wife. As is owning a small business and being the father of 4 great kids. I’m grateful to live in a safe, cozy apartment (both in Maui and Santa Monica). But as great as it is to have these people, places and things in my life, they are the benefits of the peace I get from working the program, rather than the source of it. Without my commitment to the program, even if I had all these gifts, I couldn’t appreciate them or be happy. I thank the 12 steps and all of you for showing me the way. I am eternally grateful and ILML! – James

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Peace of Mind

“We enjoy … real peace of mind. To those of us who have hitherto known only excitement, depression, or anxiety – in other words, to all of us – this newfound peace is a priceless gift…” 12&12

It took me some time to accept the fact that those three – excitement, depression, & anxiety – were very prevalent feelings in my life prior to recovery. Peace, serenity & balance were not goals I strived for (I thought they were boring). Today, my entire outlook of life has changed. Peace, serenity & balance are my best friends – and I derive delicious satisfaction and contentment from hanging out with them. The 12 steps have given me a new manual for living – a new purpose – and by following this simple design for living, I really have been launched into the 4th dimension. I know how truly lucky I am, which is why ILML so much! – James