“… a loving Higher Power is always present.” – In God’s Care

Really? Evidence points to fact. Proof asserts a fact irrefutably. Scientists use the term “empirical proof” or “empirical evidence”. And there is absolutely no empirical evidence to support the existence of God. About half of the founders of AA doubted the existence of God (see We Agnostics). So why believe in something that absolutely can’t be proven? 

Because the benefits of belief in God actually have been proven. That’s why billions—yes, with a B—believe in a God of their understanding. I’ve also discovered, from personal experience, that the deeper my belief, trust, and reliance upon my higher power is, the more emotional, spiritual and physical benefits I receive. The healthier I feel. The happier I am. The easier life is. The better my relationships are with others. Which means that I’m actually living proof that this belief in a higher power thing actually works. 

The simple truth is that when I work diligently to maintain my spiritual connection by consistently using the tools of the program… ILML! 

– JamieQ

“Your power is so strong that whatever you believe comes true.” – The Mastery of Love  

If you had made that statement to me 20 or 30 years ago, I would have responded with a list of reasons why it’s patently false. That’s because I misunderstood what I believe the author is talking about. 

I think what he means is that if I believe I’m a failure, and keep saying it, I will be a failure. If I believe I’m a success, and keep saying it, I will be a success. If I believe I’m unhappy and life sucks, and keep saying it, I will be miserable and see life through those lenses. And if I believe I love my life, and keep saying it, I will love my life. 

Nothing happens for me instantly, but through repetition, consistency, and dedication to my words, thoughts and actions, I am growing into the person I want to believe I am – a great man. And most importantly, throughout that process… ILML!! 

– JamieQ

“… awareness is often followed by a period af acceptance before we can take action.” – Courage to Change 

In the past, when someone said something to me, or someone failed to live up to a promise, or something happened that didn’t meet up with my expectations, I reacted—immediately. Words would fly out of my mouth, and I’d often take actions that would make an uncomfortable situation much worse. Even today, when I’m off my game, I’ve been known to react without pausing and gracing the space. But the program teaches me that there’s a much healthier choice when my expectations don’t materialize: to keep my mouth shut, to take some time to get into acceptance, and then respond to the situation in a way I’ll be proud of later. The less reactive I am, the less wreckage I create, and the more… ILML! 

– JamieQ

“… running conversations in my head with people who are not with me, or going over and over some possibility or fear… I was entirely ready to have God remove this.” — Reaching for Personal Freedom, Step Six

Stinking thinking makes me crazy and miserable. It’s a defect I can certainly live without. To better understand steps six and seven, I read and studied the books Drop the Rock and You Can’t Make Me Angry. The newfound knowledge helped me learn how to become aware of, and discard, those attitudes and behaviors that no longer serve me, saving me (and others) from unnecessary pain and suffering.

I’m certainly not perfect, and have by no means eradicated all my defects, but as long as I continue to keep an open mind, and do the daily spiritual and recovery work necessary to grow, abundance keeps flowing in and… ILML! 

– JamieQ

“You will become happy, respected, and useful once more.” — 24 Hours a Day

Before sobriety I wasn’t really happy. I wasn’t all that useful. And I definitely wasn’t respected. Truth was, I was a 20 year old selfish punk. I was also lost in the world, trying to find myself the only way I knew how, through drugs and alcohol. Instead, all I accomplished was to temporarily get away from the feeling of being lost, but eventually even that stopped working. 

Giving up the mind altering stuff helped, but I still felt alone until I embraced the principles of our program. But I it was the people in the rooms that held my hand and showed me the way back home, to a place where once again I could find peace, contentment and even happiness without needing to drink or get high. And I found a useful purpose too, to guide others down the path and away from misery, which gave me both self-respect and the respect of others. 

The gift that AA, Al-Anon, and the members of both programs have given me, is like a priceless diamond. And when I remember its value by making it a priority to take the time, to do my part, in practicing and sharing the program each and every day, ILML! 

– JamieQ

“The very act of paying attention to something increases the possibility that it will continue to occur.” – Attitudes of Gratitude in Love 

This is, of course, another way to describe the phenomenon of manifest destiny. We have much more power than we know to create the life we want to live. And we can do so simply by becoming extremely conscious of what we think about. Focusing on abundance, love, gratitude, joy, serenity, peace, harmony, health, creativity, helpfulness, self-care, integrity, and all the good things that are ever present brings more of it into our lives. Conversely, focusing on all the problems, the things we wish were different, our frustrations, our ailments, people that bother us, those things that are not going our way, our stresses, and our difficulties create more of those things and feelings in our lives. I’ve been asked often how exactly we change our focus and direct our thinking along spiritual lines consistently throughout each day. My answer is always the same. Consistent, diligent, practice of rituals designed to refocus our minds upon all the wonderful things that are here now, and all the wonderful things that are coming our way. I call practicing theses rituals that invite abundance “Doing the Daily Deal”. And I’m living proof that it works because I’m one of a very few that Do the Daily Deal very religiously and I can tell you very honestly that… ILML! 

– JamieQ

“The people in this program show that they love us, that they expect nothing in return, and that they only want good things for us.” – In God’s Care

I have four amazing children, each one a miracle in my life. I know that my kids, just like me, want loving friends and tools to use in order to make living life, and getting along with others, much easier. That’s exactly what the program has given me. Loving friends and clear direction on how to love life, be successful, feel great emotionally and play well with others. So how does a father, who loves his kids beyond words, bring his kids into the program so they can benefit in the same way I have? As much as I’d like to to drag them in, sit them down, and give them all the gifts I’ve received, ours is a program of attraction not promotion. Of course I hope that one day they can feel the love of our fellowship surround them, but until then I’ll just keep doing the Daily Deal and being the best daddy I can because when I do that… ILML! 

– JamieQ

“I am responsible for my own serenity.” – Heard in Al-Anon

When my brother Robert quotes this in a meeting, he always makes it a point to say the word “period”. “I am responsible for my own serenity PERIOD.” This reminds me that if I’m not serene, I can change it anytime I’m ready to step up and take those actions that bring the feeling of serenity into my life. Often this means first detaching from the person, place, situation or steam of thoughts that are taking my serenity away. Then, because the program is so rich in solutions, I have an endless supply of options available to me to being back my serenity. And once I’m feeling happy, joyous and serene again, as if by magic, my problems don’t seem so overwhelming anymore and… ILML! 

– JamieQ

“When you move past good and bad you become less concerned about outcome… it’s often not the experience that matters as what you do with that experience.” – goo.gl/AjJ4j6
This excerpt comes from an article about the Tao parable of the farmer and his horse. The neighbor keeps saying “That’s really bad,” and “Thats’s great!” depending upon what happens to the farmer. But the farmer always replies “We’ll see”. The author talks about how often things in the world (and in his life) at first appeared bad, only to later result in some goodness. I was the child and sibling of alcoholics/addicts, and later an alcoholic/addict myself. Today I’m a sober, active member of both AA and Al-anon and am able to inspire others by sharing my experience, strength and hope with them. Ironically, I actually found in the 12 step rooms the happiness, love and life I had always sought in booze, pot, pills and cocaine. Truly, luckily, because of the program, and doing the daily deal, ILML!

– JamieQ

After years and years of guilt, shame, resentment, hurt, struggle, criticism, failures, and weakness, most of us have learned to dislike so many things about us that we barely even acknowledge ourselves when we look in the mirror. We look at our hair, our skin, or some imperfection we wish wasn’t there. So how do we turn it all around, so that we not only look at ourselves, but love what we see and who we are? This is how I did it…

Now before you read this suggestion, I should tell you that your dis-ease, that part of you that wants to keep you down, will think this is stupid, useless and conceited. But if you really want to love yourself, I urge you to try this for 30 days straight and then see how you feel. It doesn’t matter if you’re just acting the part and don’t believe what you’re saying—just give it your best shot. Look into the mirror each morning and say the following words out loud, with the most enthusiasm you can muster up: 

“Wow, look at you! You’re beautiful/handsome! You’re amazing! You’re smart and creative! You’re kind and compassionate! You’re responsible and unselfish! You’re the best person I know! You’re so awesome! I love being you!”

This worked for me, and today I believe every word of it I say each morning. When I spend the time to take actions that are loving to myself, I do a much better job at loving others, and inevitably… ILML! 

– JamieQ